One of the joys of working with a top notch editor is that I can see my book getting better and better before my eyes. I'd describe most of what I've been doing as "thining" out the dull bits and "growing" by making the scenes read more visually.
Earlier this summer, my Mum and Dad came over from New Zealand to spend six weeks with us. They loved spending time with my wife and I and especially the kids (they essentially met them for the first time) but I suspect that now they're back home my Dad, in his pragmatic and farmerly way, will be busy tell his friends how he pruned the tree that grows on our front lawn. The original property developers planted a (seeminlgy random variety of) tree on each of the properties on our street; we got a crab apple tree. It had grown quite tall and had even grown a few fruit; we were quite pleased with it.
My Dad was only in the door 5 minutes before he told me he wasn't happy with the tree he. Dads like doing things for their kids and given that we live so so far away he's not had much chance to do that so, fighting off sleep following over 30 hours of travel, he started explaining to me what was wrong with the tree. He said that the tree was - as trees do - putting all of its energy into growing tall which was fine in a forest where the taller trees get the most sunlight. But, he said, since it was a "townie tree" we'd be better off with a shorter, rounder tree on a small residential space like ours. He added, very seriously, that a storm could easily uproot a tall tree like ours.
So, with my blessing, he borrow a saw and pruning sheers from a neighbour - noting that his son doesn't own such necessities - then sawed (pruned, he said) the tree to half its height. He spent another 20 minutes shaping the tree with the sheers. I got delegated the "boys" job of tidying up the offcuts and taking them to the dump.
The tree now looks ugly, squat and uncared for. But I can see how, in 2 or 3 years, it will grow into a nicely shaped suburban tree. And that's because my Dad forced it to put its energy into growing into that shape.
That's essentially what Susannah, my editor, is helping me do with my book. She is showing me where to cut it, so that I can put my energy into growing it into the right shape. The good news, for me, is that my book is currently about the right hight and shape, its just the individual branches that need shaping and polishing.
Which brings me to my point!
I'm struggling with growing one part of my book. Currently Steve, the stories hero and narrator, has TOLD us about how he doesn't get along with Harry, the company's CEO. I want to change that to SHOW Harry being a prick, but I'm struggling to write an arrogant, assertive, confident, CEO-like, asshole-like dialogue. I don't talk that way myself and the CEO-like people I know are all really rather lovely and polite.
Do you know of any books - autobiographies, fiction, biographies, say - which contain that kind of dialogue, so that I can base Harry's words on someone else's?
.oOo. Sent from my BlackBerry www.ClarkeChing.com +44(0)7920114893